This is it! Finally! After 2 years, 3 months and 13 days of having The’Bug in our family, today is THE DAY that the Judge finally makes it official! The’Bug will really and truly and forever be OURS!!!!! All I can say is…
At 72 and 56 years old, Bob and I are going to be new parents today! (Oh! I think I feel a labor pain coming on…or wait, is that just arthritis?)
The’Bug seems appropriately excited today, although she has long moments of being pensive, thoughtful, even a little down. I am sure she is having a lot of mixed feelings that might include a sadness at the loss of a dream…her forever dream of reuniting with her birth-Mom. I do think she is coming to terms with that idea (that it’s never going to happen)…rolling it around in her mind, and her heart, and accepting it. It must be hard. I feel for her. Bob and I are only gaining. We are gaining a daughter. And yes, she is gaining a new forever Mom and Dad, but she is also losing a chunk of her past. At the very least she must be…nostalgic? I know she starting to lose some of the memories of her birth family, because she keeps making up stories about them. She always starts those stories with “Way before I had you, Terri…”. And I am sure some of the stories are based on her perceived truth with a few imaginative embellishments added to fill in the parts that she can’t quite remember any more. Some of her “memories” of her past with her birth family are full-on fabrications, often to demonstrate how she already did something that she wishes we were doing now. “Way before I had you, Terri, my grandma took me to Dairy Queen and bought me three ice creams! All at one time! And I ate them all!”
This morning she was very excited to see that I was wearing new jeans and a new shirt that goes with the necklace she bought me for Christmas. (A necklace that I would never normally wear (too fancy for my taste) and she gave me a big, genuine hug. When she discovered the new fancy dress and shoes that Bob and I bought for her I got an extra squishy hug!
So ya, I’m excited. Bob seems pretty excited. The’Bug has appropriately mixed feelings. I don’t really know how Nick is feeling about it as he hasn’t said too much about it, but he is going down to the courthouse with us. I do know he is taking the role of Big Brother very seriously, and is doing an excellent job of it. The’Bug adores him, and he has taken on the task of educating her on all things Star Wars.
This is a big day for our family. I can’t believe we are finally here. 2 years, 3 months, and 13 days.