It’s all done but the paperwork

IMG_1162Yup, the final interrogation (home interview) is over. The adoption social worker pretty much asked us an abbreviated set of questions that she already asked us downtown in her office. I wonder if she thinks our answers will be different when we are in the comfort of our home? I really feel like they are trying to catch us in an indescrepancy….

Oh well. They didn’t. Bob and I don’t lie. We are on the same page. We are consistant. We don’t have to worry about keeping our stories straight, because they aren’t stories. We are who we are, we aren’t hiding anything, and our intentions are pure…So…we win.  😉

The next steps are all up to the adoptions social worker and the county social worker. The adoptions social worker has to write up a recommendation for the judge, and the county social worker is preparing a report for “The Telling”. From what I understand this is where they take our Rosebug’s entire county case and prepare a meeting with Bob and I, and the two social workers, and they tell us everything they know about her, except identifying information about her biological family. This is what is considered “full disclosure”. I feel like I am buying a house or something. I guess we are in escrow…

After The Telling, we sign the escrow papers…oh…wait..I mean the final adoption papers. After that, they put the case before the judge and then he sets a court date, and then we go in and he makes it final. I guess she gets a shiny new birth certificate and everything. Oh, ya, and a set of new (okay, slightly used, the classic model) permanent parents, such as they are…

So that sounds all easy and simple, right? Well for us I suppose it is, because all we do now is wait. And wait. And wait. From what I understand, this bureaucratic paperwork part of this process is a slow moving machine. It is expected that “The Telling” might happen in January, but that the final court date probably won’t happen until April or May of 2016. When we know  the final date, we will be planning an “adoption party” and all family and friends will be invited.

So, do we have any doubts or reservations about our decision to adopt? NO. It’s a commitment that we made and  take seriously. Do I worry about our future together? Hell, yes. She is a sweet, kindhearted soul who loves us, loves everybody, who is by nature happy, but she is also very strong willed (see “she wants to do it her way”) and she hates school. Since school is a very high priority to me, I foresee a bit of conflict in our future. And our past. And our present. Lol. I’m really, really hoping we can work past this. We’ve been homeschooling for a half of a school-year, now (repeating first grade), and while her academic learning is sky-rocketing, her attitude is still in full battle mode. Sigh….we’ll just keep marching on…

I really wish I knew what my Li’l Rosebug really thought about this whole adoption process. I understand the fact that she doesn’t really have a choice. I agree that she is too young to be allowed to have a say in this matter. But surely she has an opinion, but she doesn’t really let on what it really is, deep down. She hasn’t learned how to really put her deeper feelings into words, yet. She will tell us that she is glad we are adopting her, of course, and I think that on most levels she is. But she must be unsure about her future as well. And wonder why she got stuck with us…a couple of old fogey’s with an obsession with education! And I know she is wondering about why this has all happened to her. Why did her bio-Mom fail her so?

I keep telling her that God put us together for a reason. And I know He did. Sometimes, if it weren’t for my faith in His wisdom, I would feel like we were mis-matched, lol. Why couldn’t I have gotten one of those kids who love to learn, as much as I love to teach? And then I figure….He knows what He is doing. I guess He thinks I need a challenge, and she needs a strong educator or she would simply not get educated. She spent an entire year in public school and learned little more than how to convince her teacher and everyone in the school how incapable she was. As I homeschool her and see her amazing academic growth (in between the battles) I know I’m doing the right thing. And when we aren’t doing schoolwork, she is really a great kid! Funny, smart, creative, sensitive…just a few more descriptive words for our new little girl.

All in all, I guess the final word is that we are moving forward in the process, but the job isn’t finished until the paperwork is done.Paperwork


10 Thoughts on “It’s all done but the paperwork

  1. So frustrating but all worth it! I know that Rosebug is very lucky little girl 🙂 Hugs!

  2. So exciting! You all are a blessing to each other. Every rose has its thorns…your Rosie is still blooming and will one day give you the answers. Congratulations to you all!!

    • Territoons on December 17, 2015 at 3:56 pm said:

      That’s a good image…my beautiful Li’l Rosebug with thorns…so true
      Now…where are those pruning clippers?

  3. Samantha on December 17, 2015 at 6:49 am said:

    You are exactly what she needs. You were definitely brought together for a reason!!

  4. I am very happy for all three of you. Congrats my friend! All three of you will benefit from each other. Kids sure do have a way of changing our lives don’t they?! She’s one of the lucky ones because she’s got you guys and the other way around!

    • Territoons on December 17, 2015 at 3:53 pm said:

      Thank you, Kari. I surely hope you are right. And oh, yes, kids surely have the power to change our lives!

  5. While you’re down there in the trenches, slugging away it’s hard to see the bigger picture. From my perspective, it’s all good! It’s monumental and awesome how much of a difference you and Bob make.

    • Territoons on December 17, 2015 at 3:55 pm said:

      Thank you. You are such a huge support to me, Kris. Friend, almost daily sounding board, encouraging me all along…. Not sure I could do it without your support.

  6. What an exciting adventure, Terri. I’m really happy this is transpiring through the love, joy and gratitude of God. I hope to be able to join your for the party!

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